Newsgroups: alt.religion.scientology From: an105662@anon.penet.fi (The Squirrelle) Date: Sat, 24 Dec 1994 07:36:31 UTC [M266 - I Feel Faint] Yes, I don't feel good. Fortunately, correction is just around the corner. Doctor Hubbard is IN. +------------------------------------------------------------- NORMAL PEOPLE SYMPTOM SCIENTOLOGISTS +------------------------------------------------------------- JAW PAIN Ignore it, or 2 Aspirin Audit Restimulation of Jaw $0.50c Engram, 12.5 hours. $1250 Followed by Sec Check. +------------------------------------------------------------- NECK MUSCLE ACHES Sit straight, or get a Body Thetans. Get training more comfortable chair. to OTIII, and solo-audit Clusters. Discover past life as 14th Century Fresco Artist. $127,500 +------------------------------------------------------------- BOWEL PROBLEMS Take Laxatives, See Get Touch assists for affected Doctor if pain persists. area. Write success story. $Free, but better do more Dn. +------------------------------------------------------------- IRRITATED EYES Eye drops and rest. Purification Rundown, followed by Dianetics Auditing to cure psychosomatic illness. Sweat Polyethylhydride in Sauna. +------------------------------------------------------------- UPSET WITH LIFE See a psychologist and talk Join Scientology, change your about your worries. religion, confess your sins of of this and past lives. Discover past life as Hitler and do purif and sweat ZYKLON gas. Write success story. Get and lose BT's. Become a Class 12 Auditor. Be a Flag Slave. Sail the seas with the Sea Org. Sign Billion year contract. +------------------------------------------------------------------- DEAD * Write Success Story. Audit 'Maggot Auditing List' until F/N. Do purif to get rid of the smell. Word Clear 'Decompose'. Do 'Death' repair list. Get another Life. Do the whole crazy Scientology thing again. Suffer from 'Light at End of Tunnel' Engram. +------------------------------------------------------------------- Life is fun for a 1.1 It is also somewhat less complex! The Squirrelle [One-Point-One] +--- The Squirrelle, Anti-Scientologist and proud of it. ---+ Tone Scale 1.1 |<<"LEGAL has been assigned a condition of NON EXISTENCE">>| KoX Wog |"Scientology exists to remind normal people what STUPID is"| -{}_{}- SP | an105662@anon.penet.fi, Black Hat #12, J&D, Free Agent | (. .) | Doctor of Scientology, Dianeticist, Clear, OT5, Certified |-oOo-=(*)=-oOo- +--- Making Elron's Psycho-Weasels sweat the Real World! ---+ // # \\ 266 ------------------------------------------------------------------------- To find out more about the anon service, send mail to help@anon.penet.fi. Due to the double-blind, any mail replies to this message will be anonymized, and an anonymous id will be allocated automatically. You have been warned. Please report any problems, inappropriate use etc. to admin@anon.penet.fi.