Newsgroups: alt.religion.scientology From: Kim Baker Subject: MY STORY : PART 10 Date: Mon, 12 Dec 1994 11:39:50 +0000 So, I had gained the admiration of some of the Scientologists on the net with my "success" in "exposing" Dennis. They are divided on the a.r.s issue - some feel that a.r.s are just a "bunch of misfits" and that Scientologists should NOT post to a.r.s., and give the "SPs" a "game" - they think that if there are no Scientologists posting, you'll all get bored and just go away. Hah! Others feel that something should be done to handle a.r.s., and those were the ones who were very, very impressed by my "handling" of Dennis. Ironically, (and here comes ANOTHER contradiction), they all felt that I had done MAJOR damage to the Church with my first few "critical" postings. Yet, they consider a.r.s not important! If they respond to my public confession at all, it will probably be to quote "The code of a Scientologist", and say that my "handling" of Dennis was a violation of this code, and therefore I was not acting as a Scientologist should. Hah! That is double-think, and a classic way that they set people up to take the fall for something, while denying any part in it themselves. An old strategy. No, I was acting EXACTLY as a Scientologist should, when dealing with a "Suppressive". THE FINAL BREAK FROM THE CULT The episode with Dennis shocked me - at what I was capable of. It resulted in me splitting into TWO DISTINCT personalitites - the real me, and the "Scientologist" me. I was still waiting for the famed Security Check that I had agreed to go in for when I first "re- converted". I went through one of the most intense inner struggles that I have EVER been through, and I became impatient for the Security Check and Clearance, which would enable me to go back into Scientology. I knew that the "Scientology" me was losing the battle. And this is the second mistake the Church made. If they had got me in for my Sec Check, at this stage, I would have been lost forever. It was THAT close. Fortunately for me, and many others, their own incompetence and slowness delayed the Security Check. In the meantime, while continuing to read a.r.s., I saw the affidavits, and then the exposure of Scientology infiltration into our new government here in South Africa by a South African newspaper. Well do I know that WISE is a front group for Scientology. This, combined with the hundreds of private communications I continued to receive from concerned members on a.r.s, who would not give up on me, and my deep guilt over what had happened with Dennis, and what I nearly did to Martin (and others) in private - all cumulatively led to the TRUE me winning. Deep, deep inside, I made the break. I posted to a.r.s for the first time in ages, in response to the article on South Africa. This brought in several stern reprimands from Scientologists on the net. I had been ordered NOT to read a.r.s anymore. I ignored them. I continued posting, and the ME, the REAL ME came flooding back, with FORCE. My cult persona was finally dead! I was BACK!!!!!!!!!!!! FREEDOM!!! I have been REVELLING in my freedom to communicate again, and since I started posting the "my story" series, I have been FLOODED with communications from around the world. OSA must have panicked, realising that they had bungled over the Sec Check, because their last, most subtle attempt to silence me, using my dear friend H to get me back, was the most deadly on their part. That was the true test for me. In breaking with her, I have broken my last link to them, forever! It hurt like bloody hell, but I had seen enough to know. I can never trust her again, she is answerable to Flag by virtue of being an OT8, and I know she will lie to me, or trick me, if it is necessary. I WILL BE ATTACKED SOON They will probably declare me a Suppressive person, in my absence, and not inform me. Now that they have realised that I am not going back, that I will NEVER go back, they will haul out their tired old "How to handle Black PR" policy - and they will try to discredit me, ruin my reputation, expose my "overts", and if this fails...well, THAT will be interesting, because, per the policy, "ONLY COUNTERATTACK handles" - so I am prepared for some very real attacks on me now. Open attacks, covert attacks - I am in for it, I know. For daring to speak out. For daring to depart Scientology publically. I have set up an elaborate system whereby if anything happens to me, you will all be informed of it. Newspapers will be informed of it. Several agencies will be informed of it. And everyone will be informed of many other things too. So, OSA, if you DO resort to covert means, the end result will be VERY embarressing to you. I would advise you to leave me alone. More to follow in Part 11 Kim Baker