Newsgroups: alt.religion.scientology,comp.org.eff.talk,misc.legal,misc.legal.computing,misc.int-property,alt.slack,alt.clearing.technology,alt.support.ex-cult,alt.recovery.religion Subject: Thoughts on my predicted demise From: inForm@primenet.com (Rev. Dennis L Erlich) Date: 26 Feb 1996 16:52:02 -0700 Faithful Reader, It's been a while since I did more in my postings than point to cracks in the law where the scienos can do their dirtywork. Frankly, it's not all that interesting to me. If those lawyer threads are just going to be a general discussion about copyright law or the american justice system, alt.religion.scientology should be trimmed from the distribution. That there are many injustices in the world is certainly a given. In the case of Your Humble Narrator, it seems like I have combined two character elements which need to be expressed by seperate players, if the story is to have emotional impact. It is always more effective if the victim is not left standing after the "tragic injustice." S/he should be unable to complain about what what was done. It should be left to another character, someone more objective, perhaps even skeptical at first, to point to what happened, and gain the empathy of the reader. So many times during the years since I left the cult, I have been subject to dirty tricks. I have long since given up holding on to anything I care about, including my own life. Perhaps to the casual reader, I seem to be anesthitized to events. I'll give you an example: There is no time while I drive during which I am not concerned about being followed; constantly checking the rear-view mirror, constantly ready to duck if a car comes up alongside. Another thing: I have not met anyone in years about whom I have not wondered; were they placed in my life by the cult. The scienos brag they have me "pinned down". This is because they know my minimal movements. They say I look ugly in my bathrobe. This is because I am under surveilance by them. You try it for a week and see how it effects your emotional balance. On second thought, don't bother. I've had so much practice adjusting to these kinds of things. Take my advice: you better steer clear. And while I'm on the subject, I certainly thought I've made it evident that I do not in any way consider myself worthy of emulation. Quite the contrary! I advise people *not* to end up like me. Do not take the path I am on. Do not try to be like me. "Like me" is exactly the *wrong* way to be. It is, as Andy and the scienos are so fond of pointing out, a good way to get yourself into a mess. Society trains us to be less and less confrontational. To acquiesce and back off, rather than to take a stand and not budge. Against this sweeping social current, I am attempting to remain balanced on the tip of a life in which I became too proficient at things with which no human being should become familiar. No matter how casual I make it seem, it is not particularly easy. Sometimes I use a part of my personality I hate, vitreolic rhetoric, to rail against darkness itself. Of this, I am not particularly proud. But I have my own unique dark wail. It warns others to stay away from my footsteps. The reasons should be obvious. When I go to Clearwater for the March 9th protest rally against the scienos' harassment of critics, I will be raising the ante a bit. Since I left scientology and began speaking out in the early 80's I have had a number of direct death threats. Once a man threatened to kill me for *accidentally* getting his wife out of the cult. Se had watched me talk her sister out of suicide and out of the cult in a 24 hour period. Another threat occurred when I finally acquessed and told some chap the Oat Tea 3 story. A couple of hours later he was driving around town with a rifle, looking to talk to me. Perhaps it is true, as one "former" scieno security officer said on irc the other nite, that I will probably be shot while getting off the airplane in Tampa. This dude was only betting on the number of bullets I'd take. I heard that he later claimed it was just exaggeration. Hyperbole. Isn't that what they told the Clearwater Police about the Hispanic maid who had been threatened with death for running away from the cult's Clearwater Florida organization. "We were just exaggerating." Well, whatever. I expect the scienos to attempt to stage an incident to either have me arrested or set up a frivolous law suit against me. This would be extremely inconvenient for me, but it would allow me to hang around the Clearwater area and mess up the "flows" of the scienos' tax-free, cash-cow, golden-goose, brainwashing factory: Flag (the Flagship Land Base). I'd love to start a one-man, continuous picket in front of the Ft. Harrison Hotel. Bill Franks did it. Shortly after Tubby named him Executive Director International (For Life), in 81, the poodle had him kidnapped to Hemet. Bill escaped and came back to Clearwater. He marched back and forth in front of the Fort Harrison Hotel with a sign that said something like "The Scienos Stole Our Church". It made quite an impression on the staff. Me particularly. I think he marched every day for a week. I could see him out my hotel window. I still have dreams about being lost in Clearwater. Trying to get out. Trying to find my things in the Ft. Harrison Hotel, so I can leave. They are never terrifying nightmares. Sometimes I am successful and the dreams are happy. But most of the time, they are mildly uncomfortable. The scienos in the dream are always very polite to me, but continually misdirect me or block my quest for egress. I have a couple of reasons to be ambivalent about going to Clearwater. It should be fun, though. I met Steve Fishman last night. Glad I did, too. Now I know what my friend, Joyce Stephenson, saw in him. With a genuinely jovial demeanor, he succinctly explained a lot of things about his adventure which had "eluded my understanding". I now consider him a very credible person, notwithstanding his tendancy toward excessive optimism. :) In the freedom of speech v. copyright sekrit skripture case, we received notice that we will be getting a deposition transcript reimbursement from the state court reporter's group, due to the pro bono status of MoFo's defense. We expect to get the funds any time now. However we have need to encourage more contributions, as MoFo will be about $3-4,000 short, even after the transcript reimbursement comes in. If any of you feel the urge to support my work in exposing the scieno-scam, or to assist MoFo in defending freedom of speech, please send your donations to: Morrison & Foerster 345 California St. San Francisco, CA 94104 C/O Carla Oakley (make checks to MoFo and put "Dennis Erlich Defense" in the note space) Finally, I do not deny that I have not been worthy of support in the past, and perhaps am not worthy of your support now. I will attempt to become worthy should you choose not to judge me harshly for my past misdeeds. I am seeking redemption for my misspent youth, for supporting the social disease known as scientology, for the occasional cruel word or thoughtless act and for those I have unintentionally harmed. The struggle to win back my soul in which I am engaged with the scienos might warp my personality beyond recognition. It may very well be the death of me. Hey. Whatever it takes. Right? Rev. Dennis L Erlich * * the inFormer * *